Have You Heard?…Tulo’s A Bird


Rantics….Sorry for the new blog name.

WordPress wanted $300 bucks for me to be allowed to continue blogging under the Rockpile Rant because I have so many pictures uploaded. F…that.

Alternate Titles For This Blog Entry:

I got a Feel’n…It’s Time for Some Heal’n.

 Deuce is Finally Cut Loose.

Oh Boy…They Got Rid of Troy

Clap Clap Clap Clap Clap…Clap Clap Clap…So Long!

tulo tounge

For those of you who don’t know who I am. Where the hell have you been?

I’m “D” the Ranter aka the “Rockpile Ranter” aka Miles Long (on Facebook).

I was blogging before blogging was cool.

ranter and Helmer

I am the ultimate fan MLBlogger and I’m here to prove that you can be a successful blogger without a press pass or kiss’n ass.

I do not claim to be a baseball genius. I am simply a baseball fan.

I make my own rules and I tell you like it is without fear of repercussion or loss of press privledges.

The deal is real here…and will always be. 

I couldn’t sleep last night but it was that good kind of not being able to sleep.

Just before bed I heard the news that Tulo got traded. I haven’t blogged a word since the beginning of last season and today I couldn’t focus at work. All I could think of was getting home and blogging about this.


There was a time not so long ago when Hunter and I were big Tulo fans.

Tulo and Ranter

There may even be evidence out there of me sport’n a Tulo jersey at one time.

Needless to say times change and baseball players change.

My story starts off in 2008 with my first visit to Rockies Spring Training in Tucson. I was an eager young Ranter and a newbie to the spring training scene. I found myself out wandering the back fields of Hi-Corbet field, enjoying the beautiful weather and trying to figure out how things work down there.

To this day I do not enjoy asking players for autographs, however I do enjoy possessing them. So lucky for me the fun of collecting them was more powerful than my fear of walking up to a player and asking him to sign a piece of memorabilia.

I’ve never written about this before because at the time it never really hit me. I feel like the “douche seed” was planted in Tulo long before my first experience with him. While at Hi-Corbet I caught up with Tulo as he was walking in between practice fields and asked if he’d please sign my baseball. It was a tore up practice ball given to me by Usher “Bob” in 2007. It was a batting practice home run Tulo hit towards the end of the 2007 season that landed in the first row of the pavilion.

Bob tossed it to me and it was my first official baseball ever obtained at a Rockies game. Tulo looked at the ball, then looked at me and asked “Why do you want this beat up old ball signed?” I replied “it was a BP homer hit by you. He looked at me confused, then halfheartedly signed the ball, heaved it at me and took off.

I feel like this could have been the early seeds of douchieness. I was just too dumbfounded to realize it at the time.

Seconds later Helton walked by, chatted with me for a few seconds, signed my ball and a few other folks memorabilia and was off himself. Class Act.

My future interactions with Tulo never improved. Tulo deal is he shy’s away from eye contact when interacting with fans. His body language suggests that he doesn’t care for fan interaction and he especially dislikes interacting with adults fans. Signing autographs, Rockies Fest, as well as communicating with his fan base was a chore for Tulo.

I never understood that.

Maybe if Tulo had come out long ago and said, “Hey I have an anxiety thing and it’s difficult for me to interact with people”.

 Things could have been different. I get something like that. A lot of us have anxiety issues to a point. However, no such confession from the Rockies short stop..

I stopped going to Rockies picture day because all my kids ever wanted was a picture with Tulo and for three years straight Tulo walked right by my smiling kids who were patiently waiting for him. He could have taken just a second and made a few little Rockies fans day but…..he chose not to.

Just as I could choose to write something positive about the Deuce leaving Colorado but….I choose not to.

How could you walk right past these smiling faces?

H and M

Here’s a perfect example of Tulo being Tulo.

It’s a blog entry written on June 7, 2012 by my friend and fellow Rockies MLBlogger the Rox Addict.

It’s titled…The Deuce strikes again. As I said this is Classic Tulo. Click on the link and take a quick read.

I believe that Tulo was a cancer in Rockies locker room. I don’t believe he’s a leader in any way shape or form. I believe he’s about himself and his legacy and he’s not a player that other players can easily look up to. He’s not loyal to his team, and he semi-stabbed Helton in the back with his comments about not wanting to play for a losing team for his entire career.

Quote from Tulo:

 “In Todd Helton, there’s someone who’s easy to look at his career here and how it played out. I have the utmost respect for Todd, but at the same time, I don’t want to be the next in line as somebody who was here for a long time and didn’t have a chance to win every single year,” said Tulowitzki, reviewing the 17 years Helton spent as the face of a franchise that never won a division title. “He played in a couple postseason games and went to one World Series. But that’s not me. I want to be somewhere where there’s a chance to be in the playoffs every single year.”

My thought when I read that was…This coming from a P/T player??…Step up Deuce and lead the way, but…he didn’t.

When you looked at his body language/demeanor the last couple years on the field he looked like he dreaded being there.

Then there was the Yankees incident last year when he was on the DL.

tulo at yanks gameThat was a Douche move. Serious Douche move.

I’ve had some bad interactions with players before, but to my recollection never twice with the same player. I honestly cannot think of one good experience/interaction I’ve ever had with Tulo. I’m not basing my opinion of Tulo on one or two autograph denials. Autograph collectors get that all the time. My opinion is based off of years of interactions with him be it somewhere outside of Coors, Rockies Fest, Picture day, or Spring Training which I’ve attended for eight consecutive years.

I am elated for the Tulo trade. Honestly if the Rockies had traded him for nothing I’d have been ok with that as well. He needed to go. The last few years Tulo would flip-flop on whether he wanted to be traded or not. For a team to succeed You cannot have a star player who is thinking like that around a team that has aspirations of anything successful.

As I mentioned earlier that’s a cancer and it needs to be removed.

Is Tulo leaving going to fix the Rockies?…No, not right away. More deals need to be made and a new atmosphere needs to develop post-Tulo. I’m excited for this.

What about Cargo? I believe he will be traded as well. I like Cargo a lot. His recent hot-streak has brought his name back into the mix and possibly upped his value a bit. I’ll miss Cargo, he appreciated his fan base.

I needed to write this entry. I tend bash Tulo a lot and figured an explanation of sorts is in order. I have always respected Tulo’s skills when he was healthy. For me it’s his character, locker room presence and treatment towards loyal fans that I’ve grown to dislike over the years.

Props to Dick for getting this right albeit several years late.


So in closing….I’m sending “the Deuce” off with a Bird he can take with him from the  #1 Rockies MLBlogger.

Ranter fu

Enjoy the Poutine 🙂 


I’m Miles Long the “Ranter”. 

I’d like to personally thank Tulo for the inspiration to get back on a keyboard.

Good Luck Toronto…He’s your headcase now.

Previous Rockpile Rant entries can be located here: RockpileRant.com


  1. Gary X

    Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster you have returned.

    Alternate title submission: “Rockies just dropped a Deuce” 🙂 heh

    Welcome back.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. LadyP613

    oh my goodness! my daughter and I went to spring training the first year in Phoenix. He didn’t sign autographs! My daughter was heart broken…Spilly was awesome and became our #2 after Todd. Being an MLB AllStar is about more than your on field ply…you need to connect with the fns and be personable…he never did that..

    Liked by 1 person

    • RANTER

      Lady P…It was never a regular thing with Tulo. Signing autographs for Tulo was like picking up dog shit. Eventually you gotta do it but you aint got to like it. Thanks for being my first comment “P” I appreciate it…Ranter


  3. Pingback: Miles Long is the Ranter #1 « Rockpile Rant
  4. Ken

    Glad to see you blogging again. Hey, the Rockies won tonight without you know who. The Rockies can’t get any worse than they are now, so it was about time they traded Tulo. It will be a few years before we know the value of the trade.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Geri

    Hi D, or R, or ML – As always, I enjoy reading whatever you write. I have one pic of Tulo with me at Picture Day, but I understand that’s not his usual MO. I wasn’t sad to hear of his trade. However, I thought it was sad to do to Hawkins in his last season.

    Liked by 1 person

    • RANTER

      Hey Ken, maybe this will create some excitement for fans. Welcome to the new blog format. Queen Geri it’s a pleasure as always thanks for checking it out…Ranter


  6. thegr8gman

    Like you during spring training 2008 I was trying to get as many autographs of the 2007 team that I could. I would line up with the other fans at the right field exit from the clubhouse. Tulo came out of the clubhouse and was talking on his cell phone. He crossed the walkway and appeared to go into the office building on the right ignoring calls for an autograph. I figured he was heading out from the park. Surprise! He actually went to the back of the line and signed autographs from back to front. I have his autograph on my ball. The only player I saw who outwardly stiffed the fans was Ubaldo. He always gave us a big smile with a lot of teeth and said he would come back in a few minutes. He never returned.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. KDK

    Typical sour grapes, you might have some credibility to this bullshit if you had the balls to say it when he was still a Rockies player, but you didnt. It comes across as a self entitled baby thinking you deserve something you dont. He doesnt owe you anything, especially after you decided to supposed make a first time assumption. I dont believe any of this bullshit because like always this shitty story comes out after he was traded instead of each time these so called stories occurred. Enjoy your shitty franchise and keep making assumptions about players because they wont sign you stuff for a 30 year old

    Liked by 1 person

    • RANTER

      You Sir are a F’tard. I personally have been writing and blogging about Tulo’s Dick tendencies for 7 years. You just happened to read the first entry of my new blog. So like a F’tard you are spouting off at the mouth without actually knowing what you are talking about. Go troll somewhere else, this is the only comment of yours I will approve you dumbass.


  8. Jersey G

    Well said buddy!

    As any Coors Field regular knows, the guy is a piece of shit and we’ve been saying it for a long time. I could rant about a million reasons why I feel the way I do, but the reality is there is no excuse for someone who gets to play a game for a living to be mean and rude to little kids. As I said on twitter yesterday, don’t let the mountains hit you on the way out, have fun paying Canadian taxes!

    Liked by 1 person

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